“Ego” the authors of this recent book say, “can be our greatest asset in business or our most expensive liability”. In the right amounts, ego can give us the confidence, self-belief and ambition to make the transition from good to great. Left unchecked, however, it can make us rigid, stubborn and arrogant, alienating all those around us. Making sure ego works for us, rather than against us, is the ambitious aim of this book.
To this end, the authors identify three warning signs that ego is getting out of control in our personal and professional lives. The first sign is being too comparative. Too much attention to ranking, rather than achievement, can lead to us to set unrealistic and/or attainable goals (or alternatively, not aim high enough).
The second warning sign is defensiveness. Defending an idea, the authors say, is one thing, but being defensive is quite another. We insist on being ‘right’, often at the cost of important working relationships. Exaggeration, fabrication and manipulation all play their part in ‘winning’ debates, usually at the cost of overall effectiveness in both planning and execution.
‘Showcasing brilliance’ is the third warning sign. Celebrating success is one thing, but like anything, it can be done to excess. Ironically, the more we insist on our own brilliance, the authors argue, the less most people will listen, even if we do have the best ideas.
The final warning sign is seeking acceptance. When leaders want to be popular and liked, people quickly realize that flattery is more important than candour, and the organization suffers accordingly.
What remedies do the authors propose to this all-too-human list of behaviours? Humility, curiousity and veracity. Humility is defined as “an intelligent self-respect that keeps us from thinking too much or too little of ourselves”. Humility is ‘just enough ego’, and helps us narrow the gap between how we see ourselves and how others see us. Curiousity keeps us open-minded and asking questions, rather than simply defending our fixed ideas. Veracity can be defined as a commitment to the truth, to ‘follow the argument’ to wherever it may lead, even if that is uncomfortable for some individuals.
Aristotle famously argued that virtues are usually a ‘golden mean’ between two extremes (courage, for instance, is a balance between recklessness and timidity). Balance in most things, of course, is a good counsel, and it is fundamental message of balancing ego (and all its associated manifestations) that is at the heart of the book. A reflective executive may find much of interest in it.
